Babbar Matsalar Dake Janyo Mutuwar Aure 2024
Matsalar kuɗi:
idan mutum yana cikin wadata za’a iya yi mashi abubuwa kuma zai iya jurewa ba tare daya fusata ba, amma idan ya samu karayar arziki to cikin sauƙi ran shi zai iya ɓaci. Don haka matsalar kuɗi zata iya kawo rashin fahimta a tsakanin ma’aurata kuma daga bisani ta janyo mutuwar aure.
Auran mutumin da bai dace da kai ba:
misali auran mutumin daka girme shi ko ya girme ka da shekaru 15 zuwa 20, akwai yuwuwar fahimtar da kuke da ita game da rayuwa ba ɗaya bane kuma saɓani zai shiga tsakanin ku wanda zai kai ga mutuwar aure. Ko kuma yin aure da mutum mai ra’ayin riƙau da kuma mai ra’ayin sauyi,
saɓani zai iya shiga tsakanin ku domin a irin wannan yanayin mai ra’ayin riƙau zai yi yunƙurin ganin yayi tarbiyar yaran shi bisa ga hanyoyin da yawancin mutane suke yi, amma shi kuma mai ra’ayin sauyi zai nuna cewa wannan hanyar yanzu ba’a yayin ta
Auran mutumin da ra’ayi, fahimta da kuma tsarin rayuwar ku duk ba ɗaya bane: misali idan kai mai riƙo da addini ne sai ka auri mutumin da bai damu da addini ba to saɓanin fahimta zai iya shiga tsakanin ku.
Haka ma idan ka fi son zama kai kaɗai a lokacin da baka komai sai ka auri mutumin da yafi son ya kasance tare da wani a lokacin da baya komai, to saɓanin fahimta zai iya shiga tsakani.
Auran mara ilimi:
idan kai mai ilimi ne sannan ka auri mara ilimi to saɓanin fahimta zai iya shiga tsakani.
Banbancin ƙarfin basira: idan kana da ƙarfin basira sannan kuma wanda kake aure yana da ƙarancin basira, to rashin fahimtar juna zai shiga tsakani domin mutanen da suke da ƙarfin basira gabaki ɗaya tsarin rayuwar su ya banbanta dana sauran mutane. Wani nazariya mai suna “communication range” na nuna cewa fahimtar juna baza ta yuwu ba idan banbancin ƙarfin basirar mutane ya wuce maki 30.
Yin aure tsakanin mutanen da ɗabi’un su kishiyoyin juna ne: mutumin dake da ɗabi’ar shiga cikin jama’a zai ga cewa wanda yake aure dake da ɗabi’ar zurfin ciki yana yin sake damanmaki da yawa suna kuɓuce mashi a rayuwa sakamakon zama da yake yi a gida koda yaushe yana kallon talabijin, karance karance da kuma yin amfani da duniyar gizo a maimakon shiga cikin jama’a, yawo da abokai da kuma yin tafiye tafiye, amma shi kuma mutum mai son zaman kaɗaici zai ga cewa waɗannan abubuwan duk ɓata lokaci ne.
Auran mutum saboda kana buƙatar shi ba wai don kana ƙaunar shi ba: idan namiji ya kamu da son mace mai baki sannan ya aure ta saboda shi bashi da raƙewa gurin yin magana amma sai daga bisani ya koyi magana to zai ji cewa baya buƙatar ta. Sannan kuma wasu matan ɗaukewar jinin al’ada yana zuwan musu da wuri lokacin da suke shekaru talatin da wani abu, macen da taga alamun ɗaukewar jinin al’ada tun kafin lokacin daya kamata ace ya ɗauke zata iya yin gaggawan yin aure da kowani namiji koda kuwa basu dace da juna ba amma bayan sunyi auran ta haihu, zata iya rabuwa dashi saboda zata ji cewa bata buƙatar shi. Hakama idan ka auri.
mutum saboda dukiyar shi amma sai daga bisani ya samu karayar arziki, zaka ji cewa baka buƙatar shi.
Yin aure lokacin da kake matuƙar buƙatar taimako: misali auran mutum mai dukiya saboda kana so ka rabu da talauci, yin aure saboda kana fama da zaman kaɗaici, yin aure bisa tunanin cewa kin kusa fama da yankewar jinin al’ada; a duk lokacin daka shawo kan waɗannan matsalolin zaka ji cewa baka buƙatar mutumin daka aura.
Yin auran wuri: a lokacin da mutum yake ƙarami zai iya tinanin wani mutum sa’an soyayyar shi ne, amma sai bayan ya girma ne zai fahimci ba haka lamarin yake ba.
wannan ne yasa yawancin soyayyar da samari suke yi bata ɗaurewa. idan mutum yayi auran wuri ba tare daya riga ya gama fahimtar kan shi ba to rashin fahimtar juna zata iya tasowa daga bisani.
Yin aure kafin ka fahimci ko kai wanene: Duk wasu abubuwa daka yi imani dasu kayi imani dasu ne sakamakon yawan maimaitawa tare da tabbatar maka dasu, da irin wannan maimatawa tare da tabbatarwar ce yasa wasu yaran da iyayensu Kiristoci ne suke tasowa a matsayin Kiristoci, hakan ne kuma yasa yaran da iyayen su Musulmai ne suke tasowa a matsayin Musulmai. Yawan maimaitawa tare da tabbatar da magana ce yasa yaran da iyayensu mabiya addinin Hindu ne suke tasowa a matsayin mabiya addinin Hindu.
To yanzu me kake tsammanin zai faru idan mutane suka riƙa rainawa mutum wayo? Lalle babu shakka daga bisani zuciyar shi zata koma ta yadda da cewa shi darajar shi ba ɗaya take dana sauran mutane ba don haka bazai samu wani mutum wanda yasan ciwon kan shi ba da zai yadda ya aure shi.
To irin wannan mutumin duk wata macen daya samu zai iya aura amma bayan yayi auran kuma sai ya sake samun wasu abokai waɗanda suke daraja shi kuma ya samu wani aiki ko sana’a mai daraja, daga bisani sai ya fahimci kuma yawancin mutane suna yi mashi kallon mutunci, daga nan sai ya fara tunanin cewa ashe shima yana da kima da daraja kamar sauran mutane, to yanzu bai kamata ace na samu mace wayayyiya ba kamar ni? To anan ne zai fara tunanin sakin wannan matar
Yin aure domin neman yardar mutane: Idan mutum baya son aure amma sai yayi auren bisa tinanin mutane suna yi mashi kallon raini sakamakon rashin yin aure, sai daga bisani ya fahimci ai baya buƙatar yardar mutane kafin jama’a su riƙa yi mashi kallon mutunci. Babu shakka zai saki matar domin zai ga baya buƙatar ta.
Auren mace saboda sha’awa kawai: Idan namiji ya auri mace ne saboda sha’awa ta jima’i kawai, to kuwa son da yake yi mata zai gushe idan kyan jikin ta ya gushe sannan fatan jikin ta ya saki sakamakon tsufa ko haihuwa. Kuma daga nan tinanin sakin ta zai faɗo mashi a rai
Rashin tsafta da gyara jiki: Idan namiji ya auri mace mai tsafta kuma wannan tsaftar da gyaran jikin da take yi shine yaja hankalin shi ya aure ta amma sai bayan sun yi auren ta zama mara tsafta to anan soyayyar da yake yi mata zai fara dusashewa kuma daga nan zai fara tunanin rabuwa da ita.
Yawan kula wasu mazajen tare dayi musu magana.
Idan ya kama matar shi da kwarto ko idan matar ta kama shi da kwartuwa.
Kasancewa namiji ya zama bawan mace: Wato idan namiji ya zama shi ne zai riƙa yiwa mace komai kaman yi mata wanki shara ko kuma ya zama ɗan aiken ta. Wani zai yi mamakin cewa ta yaya za’a yi mata suƙi son namijin da yake kyautata masu? to dalilin kuwa shine yawancin mata suna son namiji ne mai ƙarfin zuciya (namiji wanda ya yarda da kanshi) sannan basa son namiji mai rauni,
kaga kuwa kasancewa bawan mace na tabbatar da cewa namiji yana da rauni. Don haka shi yasa idan namiji ya zama bawan mace hakan kenan yana nufin ya zama namiji mara ƙarfin zuciya kuma mai rauni domin ya yarda cewa itace ke gaba dashi ba bai shi ke gaba da ita ba.
Idan namiji ya kasance baya jagorancin mace ba ko bashi yake iko da ita ba, to soyayyar da mace ke yiwa irin wannan namijin itama tana dusashewa.
Haka ma idan namiji yana nuna cewa yana jin kunyar mace ko tsoranta shima soyayyar da take yiwa irin wannan namijin tana dusashewa.
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